By Paul David Walker, CEO
Coach
Have you ever wondered,
“Is this as good as it gets?” Even though
you are successful, does something seem missing? We buy new
cars, homes, boats, clothes and jewels; but after a momentary thrill,
that pointless empty feeling arises again.
We struggle to succeed, work all our life to
be recognized and feel powerful or beautiful in the world, and often
find that stress overwhelms our body and mind. We push
through and reach our goals. Yet somehow, again after
momentary thrills, we feel unsatisfied. Some pretend to be
happy, not wanting to seem like a failure or disappoint their friends
and family, but their face tells a different story.
I
discovered years ago, while listening to a tape by George Pransky, that
one of the reasons for this is that we
have confused life with the game of life.
Life
Itself
Eckhart
Tolle said, “We
are not living life, we are life.” Yet
we seem to get lost in “The Game of Life.”
Life
is moments of profound beauty. Life is looking into the eyes
of a child, a moment by a river when everything seems to flow together,
or when suddenly what seemed mundane now seems beautiful. It
is moments of love where you feel deeply connected to someone, being
“In The Zone,” or biting into a fresh sweet
strawberry and responding with gratitude.
When
we experience life itself, we feel peaceful and exhilarated at the same
time. It is often a simple moment when what is coming up does not seem
to matter, and yet you are fascinated with the arising of the next
moment. When you can feel the love of a child or a parent, you are
deeply living life. Its energy enters your being and you
cannot help but smile with joy.
The
Game of Life
The
rules for the game of life are like the rules for tennis, basketball or
baseball. They are not innate universal principles, like gravity, the
need for water, sunlight to grow crops, and oxygen; we have just
decided on them to create a game. In tennis inside the line
is a point, outside the line is a point for the other person.
Why? It is because we have decided. The rules change over
time to improve the game. Likewise, each society in the world
establishes rules to govern life within their countries. Each
ethnic culture has developed norms of behavior. Like the
rules of different games, they vary. If designed well, they
will enhance life. But
they are not life itself.
The
River & The Game of Life
An
example of this would be an ancient community that developed around a
river that was fed by lakes in the high mountains. The
community prospered, using irrigation to develop food production and
trade. They developed a game of life that thrived off the river, and
the innovations created by the game of life that evolved to meet the
community’s needs. This is an example
where the game of life was fed by life, which in this case was the
river.
Many
of these civilizations disappeared, because for one reason or the
other, the springs in the lakes that fed the river could not support
the growing demands of the civilization. The leaders became attached to
their game, and did not notice the relationship of the game to the
rivers ability to support the game of life that formed their
civilization.
Likewise,
an athlete who develops extraordinary physical skills playing a game
has a deep level of enjoyment of life during play. However,
many stay involved in a sport beyond their aging body’s ability to keep up with the game, some die and
others are crippled. Why? It is because they have confused the game
with life itself. They mistakenly assume that the game, not
the life force, brought them the enjoyment.
When we lose touch with life
itself, our ability to play in the game of life decreases,
and like ancient river civilizations, the game of life can destroy our
connection to life with terrible consequences.
While
playing the game of life you may notice stress and difficulty
increasing, yet because you are so attached to the game you cannot stop
playing. You lose your connection to life itself and wither
without knowing why.
Confusing
Life & The Game of Life
The
game of life we play in “Post Modern” society is
much more complex than ancient civilizations or sports games.
It is all pervasive. It seems to encompass the
globe. We are part of a game that seems to have no
boundaries. Most
are not even aware that they are choosing to play a game.
Many see the game as life itself, and this is where problems
arise. In desperately holding onto the game of life, we lose
touch with life. We become stressed, fatigued, depressed and
angry. Something is missing. Our consciousness is
focused on the game, rather than life, metaphorically, the springs that
feed our life dry up, and then playing the game of life becomes more
difficult. We lose contact with life, and hence, given
“we are life,” we
lose ourselves. We are lost in the game of life
to the point of danger, and perhaps extinction.
Consciously
Connecting With Life
In
order to play the game of life well, we need to have practices that
connect us with life itself. Without awareness that there is
a difference between life and the game of life, it will be hard to take
the time to drink from the natural springs that feed our
life. So that
is the first step to realize the difference.
The
second step is to develop
practices that help you let go of the game, and open your consciousness
to the life giving energy of “The Life Force,”
which is a multidimensional river beyond description. Meditation,
walking in nature, yoga, listening to relaxing music, and many others
similar practices can work. The key is to find ways to slow your thoughts
about the game of life. As you do, life will
naturally fill your consciousness and feed you, without which you will
die, like a flower that is not watered, or a civilization whose river
dries up.
There is No Substitute For Practice
Now
you have an intellectual understanding of the difference between LIFE
and “The Game of Life.” The thoughts
shared here only point towards the experience of LIFE. In
order to truly experience LIFE, you need to practice being present to
LIFE. If you take time each day in a meditative practice, you
will learn the difference. At first your head will be full of
thoughts, but as you learn to let go of them, you will be conscious of
LIFE instead of your thoughts about life. With practice, you
will be able to be continuously conscious of LIFE every moment of the
day. Your happiness will grow and what once seemed drab will
be full of color.
Paul
David Walker is a CEO coach, author of three books and is a leader in
his profession. It is difficult to value the impact of a
leadership consultant that has been advising
the leaders of Fortune 500 and midsized companies for over twenty-five
years. With this experience, he brings a unique perspective
that can be invaluable to leaders. Paul has advised leaders
through three downturns and recoveries in the economy. He has
lead turnarounds, acquisition integration, rapid growth, culture change
and strategic projects to align strategy, structure and
culture. His latest book is entitled, Unleashing
Genius: Leading Yourself, Teams and Corporations.
You can contact Paul at Turiya Leadership Consulting, www.turiyalc.com
or 562-233-7861.
Permission
is needed from Paul David Walker to reproduce any portion provided in
this article. This information contained in this article is
not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.
Copyright 2008 Paul David Walker
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